His palace recreated the situation that he was in- a dozen strangers with some connection here and there- who had to escape dangerous traps and vote... who among them had to die to proceed, with abstaining not being an option.
The votes were based on his memories, and I- I knew it was the wrong choice, but I pushed for a vote for a more... generous option, instead of the practical but cruel choice.
Atem died for it- a- ( her voice wavers and she can feel hot tears forming again. ) -dozens of small needles stabbed into him and drained him into a husk in minutes- he was catatonic for hours after, even after being brought back.
I mean, I guess I'm the last person who should be sayin' this since I had ta have a whole palace ta figure this out myself, but wouldn't it just be better fer you ta talk to him rather than just assuming he hates you or whatever?
Its not just that? I don't-- before, things were... Normal. Maybe I'm not used to violence, but- its easy to adjust to the magic, too- or at least to reason it out. Things burn. Things freeze. Things cut, and I can whisk away the harm with a spell. This was... it was just hellish.
[Izou, who's seen so much violence and death that it's gotten sort of rote to him, sturggling to empathize with this even though he understands it's normal.]
I mean, it'd be weirder if ya could, I think. I still remember what the first guy I killed looked like, it just don't really bother me anymore. And I don't want ya to get to that point anyway.
You are. Me and Celeste and Arven and everyone else that's your new family now, we love you.
[Even if it's slightly EMBARASSING to say!!! Also don't tell Arven he actually does remember his name.]
I don't regret becoming a manslayer and getting used to violence like that, but even when I was your age I wasn't kind and gentle the way you are. Yer meant to light up the world with that singing of yours.
( mafuyu stares for a moment, heart warming more and more before she pulls izou into a hug, hot tears welling up with joy and love instead of fear for the first time since shin's palace- )
[A few months ago, Izou would have felt like he shouldn't get such a thing, especially not from someone like Mafuyu. He was a solitary, blood covered creature and he was fine with that!!! Fine with just having his pride as a manslayer. But that wasn't really the truth.
And he can't even try to tell himself he doesn't deserve it, because Mafuyu has made it clear what the support he can give means to her. So now, he simply hugs back, maybe a little tighter than he should, but. For a long moment he neither wants to say anything nor knows what to say, but finally;]
Even if Braphine can't swing it, we'll find a way ta come visit you, alright? [Who the hell is we, Izou.]
[They'd been so bad about not being weird and pda in public he kind of just assumed she'd knew Something was happening, but alas.]
I mean, I guess it is kinda weird... Since I really did wanna kill him. But then I... learned some stuff, from one of those weird dream rooms, and we ended up talkin' more and then...
no subject
What d'you mean you got him killed? What happened?
cw body horror
The votes were based on his memories, and I- I knew it was the wrong choice, but I pushed for a vote for a more... generous option, instead of the practical but cruel choice.
Atem died for it- a- ( her voice wavers and she can feel hot tears forming again. ) -dozens of small needles stabbed into him and drained him into a husk in minutes- he was catatonic for hours after, even after being brought back.
no subject
And when he woke up proper, what'd he say to you about it? Was he blamin' you for it?
[He feels like probably no, but also if yes then he'll just have to go kill a pharaoh.]
no subject
no subject
[A pause, before he frowns.]
Unless... yer assumin' that because that's how you feel? You ain't still mad about the time I stabbed you, are ya?
no subject
...
But I wasn't. I was deliberately making a terrible choice to make myself feel better, and I pushed others into making it, too.
no subject
[Flat. A joke.]
If the others really hadn't wanted ta go with you on that choice, if they really all thought you were wrong, you think they wouldn't speak up?
no subject
( it's an outburst probably neither of them were expecting, and mafuyu is instantly mortified with herself. )
I- I'm sorry-
no subject
No! That's good! You oughta yell more, Mafuyu!! You ain't gotta act how ya think people want you to anymore!!
no subject
I don't want to it makes me feel sick.
( ... take a breath there, girl- )
no subject
Obviously that just means ya need more practice. Yelling rules.
no subject
....
I just... I keep- having nightmares about it...
no subject
[IZOU]
no subject
The latter.
no subject
I mean, I guess I'm the last person who should be sayin' this since I had ta have a whole palace ta figure this out myself, but wouldn't it just be better fer you ta talk to him rather than just assuming he hates you or whatever?
no subject
I can't get it out of my head.
no subject
I mean, it'd be weirder if ya could, I think. I still remember what the first guy I killed looked like, it just don't really bother me anymore. And I don't want ya to get to that point anyway.
But none of that's real helpful ta say, is it....
no subject
no subject
[Even if it's slightly EMBARASSING to say!!! Also don't tell Arven he actually does remember his name.]
I don't regret becoming a manslayer and getting used to violence like that, but even when I was your age I wasn't kind and gentle the way you are. Yer meant to light up the world with that singing of yours.
no subject
( mafuyu stares for a moment, heart warming more and more before she pulls izou into a hug, hot tears welling up with joy and love instead of fear for the first time since shin's palace- )
And I love you too.
no subject
And he can't even try to tell himself he doesn't deserve it, because Mafuyu has made it clear what the support he can give means to her. So now, he simply hugs back, maybe a little tighter than he should, but. For a long moment he neither wants to say anything nor knows what to say, but finally;]
Even if Braphine can't swing it, we'll find a way ta come visit you, alright?
[Who the hell is we, Izou.]
no subject
( she doesn't think anything can stop izou once he's really put his mind to it- not now that he's more than mortal.
wait. huh? )
--We?
no subject
[Even if this conversation predates the formal arrangement, he already figured this.]
no subject
( weren't they
but then, in the palaces-
and in the nekiya...
...
hold on, she's doing math.
okay, cool, makes sense. )
I'm not sure I understand the process, but I care about you both greatly and so I hope you can be happy together.
no subject
I mean, I guess it is kinda weird... Since I really did wanna kill him. But then I... learned some stuff, from one of those weird dream rooms, and we ended up talkin' more and then...
[Things just sort of got out of hand.]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)